At fifty you start to realise that you are what you are and start not to care overly about how you are viewed by others. This is both a strength but also a weakness. But, as you no longer give a fuck, the opprobrium doesn't matter. But with acceptance of character comes realisation of its flaws. Perhaps there are things I'll never do. The list might go something like this.

1) Play golf. Sport of wankers, poxy rules, dickheads, sportsmen. 19th holes. No desire, no interest, I won't accept any club that will have me and petty rules just irk me.

2) Hold dinner parties. Used to. I think you need a wife and boring mates. Don't have either.

3) Go to Glastonbury. Posh twats who chant some nonsense in support of a terrorist supporting, anti British communist and then go home to their flats in Chelsea.

4) Do drugs. Never appealed to be honest. Yeah smoked some weed at university but nothing else. No interest. Sorry. Booze is my lady one glass at a time. I can't betray her.

5) See Elvis, The Beatles, Oasis, Queen (shit I had a ticket for Maine Rd 1986 and didn't go), and hundreds of others. You look back and go... why didn't I?**

6) Live up to my own high expectations.

See note ** below.

Here's a link to Lisa Stansfield's 1st single - Your Alibis. This came out in 1982 when we were in the school play together back in Rochdale. The B Side was Springsteen's 'Because The Night' which I remember Lisa saying she wished was the A side. But the A side was my favourite. Sounds very French! I remember playing her - in return - one of my songs on the piano in a break during rehearsals. She liked it. If only I was more pushy!

* Things I'll Never Do. Isn't that the title of that pretty decent song by Stockhard Channing in Grease.

** But I did see, in no order and forgetting loads - Blur, Meat Loaf, Suzanne Vega, The Pretenders, The Milltown Brothers, Captain Sensible, New Model Army (God, they were shit), Black Grape, Alexander O'Neil, Liam Gallagher, Taylor Swift, Rod Stewart, The Charlatans, Lisa Stansfield (up close and personal), Squeeze, Julian Cope, Sleeper, Alvin Stardust, Cast, Stormzie, Shambolic, The Pinter Boys, Tim Robson